Run Run Kimmy

This might be the longest blog post ever. But its a fun story.

I watched the World Series game last night. And what a game it was. It ran very late though. I should have gone to bed earlier. I stayed in a different hotel last night, across the street from the airport. I made sure this alarm clock was correctly set to PM and set my alarm for 5:00am.

I woke up and thought I woke up early again (like I have been all trip due to the time zone difference). I decided to look at the clock anyways and it said 6:42am. I had to take a double look. 6:42am??? This must  be wrong.  I grabbed my cell phone and it had the same time. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH. My flight is at 7:10am. Do I dare try to make it? I thought I better take a shot. I chose my 7:10am flight specifically so I could home at a decent time. All the other flights would get me home after 9pm and I want to see my baby before she goes to bed. Another flight was not an option.

I had the great idea last night to pack in the morning. My belongings were scattered every where around the room. Sweet. I threw on some clothes and scrambled to put everything in my suitcase. I'm sure I left something behind. No shower, no makeup, no hair brushing. I think I even forgot to brush my teeth. I looked very pretty, I'm sure. As I rushed out of the room, I saw the hotel put my bill under the door.  Thank goodness! I don't need to stop and check out now.

I flew down the stairs, through the lobby, and out the door. I sprinted across the major road between my hotel and the airport with a purse, backpack, and suitcase in hand. My belongings were not level and I was wavering. The cross walk light showed do not walk but I couldn't wait. There was no cars so I dashed across in my black coat in dim sunlight. Not the brightest thing to do. I barely made it across the street before a motorcycle crossed the intersection. I feel like I'm Carrie Bradshaw from Sex in the City in one of her famous running scenes, but I'm wearing ballet flats instead of heals.

Whew, I hurried like hell through the airport parking lot, down through baggage claim, and up stairs to the check in counters. I'm out of breath. Yippie. No one is in line. I don't even know what time it is. I asked the check in lady if I can still catch my flight. She was rather annoyed with me and said no without checking a thing. I'm sorry to bother you grumps, but I did not intentionally mean to wake up late and jog to the airport this Friday morning. She starts whacking away at her computer and makes a phone call. She said the plane's still there but they won't hold the door for me. I can still try to make it, but I couldn't check a bag. All my coworkers know I hate carrying bags on the plane. Crap. I had to open my suitcase and pull out all my liquids, including my "Very Sexy" Victoria's Secret perfume and contact solution and put them in the trash. All victims of my tardiness. Seeing Teagan today is more important to me.

Off I go running again to security. Boo, there is a line. I look at my watch 7:00am. 7:02am...argh...hurry up. Then a page came on over head. It was for me. "Kimberly So&So, please report to gate 12. Your flight is ready to depart and you're the last passenger to board." Haha. I've never heard "last passenger to board" before. Alright, no more waiting. Security said I could jump ahead but I had to ask every person in front of me. Everyone let me cut! They were really nice. I'm rushing to get all of my stuff on the conveyor belt to go through the scanner and by accident knocked the man's bin in front of me on the floor. It had his laptop in it. Oops. He did not seem pleased. I explained my story, but he was less than impressed. He must not have any kids. I'm very sorry!

This security checkpoint had the full body scanner. I didn't have time for TSA's friendly pat down so I went through it. Crap. I forgot I put my jewelry in my pocket to save time. TSA didn't like that. Now it cost me time.

Finally through security and I'm off running again. Of course my gate had to be far away. I'm getting tired now. I wondered what people thought of me sprinting through the terminal. I go up some escalators and I see gate 12! There is no one there but one lone man at the door. The door is open!!!! I run up. He asks me "Are you Kimberly?" Ha, I'm on a first name basis. Yep, that's me!!!!! He took my ticked at let me in.

At 7:10am exactly my butt was in my seat. Not bad for waking up 28 minutes ago.  The only overhead space left was in first class so I didn't get to pull my laptop or magazines out to read on my 3.5 hour flight. But that's okay. I made it! I was a momma on a mission to get home. I even got a morning workout in. ;)

I had plans to buy my hubby and daughter souvenirs at the departing airport. That didn't exactly work out. I hope they like their gifts from my layover airport in Texas. YeeHaw!

You know you're a ftwm when...you won't let anything stop you from seeing your kid.

Video Chatter

I just finished a video chat with Bret and Teagan. Loved it! We have a computer hooked up to our TV so Teagan saw me on the TV. She offered me many toys and wanted to share her dinner with me. This was the most interactive she's ever been with a video chat. On previous video chats she didn't seem to notice me. She's not a big TV watcher in the first place.  Her interaction was what this homesick mommy needed. I love watching her grow. 

T minus 24 hours till I'm home. :)

You know you're a ftwm when... time away from your children and your ability to focus are inversely proportional. 

Here's Teagan on Halloween last year. Her daddy thought she wanted to be a green dragon. Every little girl's dream right? I'm looking forward to her trick or treating this year. She will be a kitty. She told me so.

I'm leaving on a jet plane

Well 2 days down of my 4 day work trip.

Day 1: Thumbs down.
First day out was all traveling. 12 hours. Two flights and a car ride made me exhausted. Why is traveling so tiring? I'm just sitting. I woke up sad and it didn't go away. Every mommy and toddler pair at the airport made it worse.  I checked on Teagan before I left in the morning and accidentally work her up, an hour before she normally wakes up. Sorry hubby for dropping her off in our bed and running out the door! That was not a good start.

Day 2: Thumbs up
Worked all day and rocked it. I'm solo on this trip. Well my manager is with me, but I'm the only engineer. First time by myself and I got most of our work accomplished. I love what I do and today reminded me of that. For dinner, the boss and I ate on the deck of a nice restaurant overlooking a river with huge boulders. Check out the picture of it below. Today was a good day.

I came back to my hotel room tonight and heard a noise inside. After being startled, I realized it was my alarm. My 6:00am alarm went off at 6:00pm since the clock has am and pm switched. The last work trip I was on had the same setup. Whats up with that? Good thing my body is on a different time zone and woke up way before my alarm anyways.

Due to the time difference, I haven't been able to video chat with Bret and Teagan. I check my email tonight and found 3 videos of Teagan sent by my husband. Yes!!! He is so thoughtful. See?... I mean it when I say I'm lucky to have him.


You know you're a ftwm when...you accidentally wake up your kid, you're not entirely sorry since you get a little more time with her :)

Photo Bret sent me on night one. At least someone will eat his fettuccine .

View from dinner tonight.

She's part me!

My daughter looks nothing like me. She is a spitting image of her daddy and her grandma on her dad's side. Their baby photos look just like Teagan. My daughter and I also have opposite personalities. I'm content being by myself and calm. She's outgoing and high energy. 

While though I grew her, I sometimes wonder if she's really mine. 

At her 15 month check up, I asked the doctor what blood type she has. And it is....O+. That's my type! I was rather excited. My husband didn't really get my excitement. There is something in her that is part me!   

I should post pictures of my husband's baby photos. Maybe someday when I have free time and remember. 

You know you're a ftwm when....mommy brain never goes away. 

Moments like these

Teagan melted my heart last night. I'm still in bliss.

We flew up to my parent's house for the weekend. Bret and I are going to a football Saturday at my Alma Mater (I cannot wait!). Teagan will be spending the day with her grandparents.

We boarded the plane but hadn't pushed back from the gate yet. Teagan flew as a lap child. She was looking everywhere. The window, the overhead controls, the tray table, & the people were all very exciting. She was her usual busy self. Then out of no where, she rotated her body towards me. She placed one hand on each of my checks and pulled me in. She kissed me on the lips. A real kiss! This was my first kiss from her. Oh how sweet that was. I'm smiling writing about it.

Her daddy told me earlier in the week he got a kiss. That was suspect, till now. How lucky and blessed we are.

You know you're a ftwm when...you child can make you forgot about a hard week with just one simple gesture.

Traveling Momma

Its done. Tickets are booked for another work trip. 4 days, 3 nights. Not too bad.

This is only my 2nd work trip since Teagan has been born. My team is awesome! They respected my wishes that I didn't want to travel the first year of her life. Now they need me. Travel is a tricky subject. I loved to travel before Teagan. I enjoy my work. But now, there is someone I miss and I feel I burden my husband by making him a single parent for a week.

I had knots in my stomach the first trip I took. I psyched myself out. It turned out it wasn't so bad. I had a picture of Teagan in my binder that I gazed at every other minute. I was busy with long days that time flew by.  I was able to video chat with my family. That made me feel right at home.  And my husband rocks! He is a great Mr. Mom and supportive of me.  I could not travel if it wasn't for him.

I feel obligated towards my team. They have been supportive of me and I want to help them.

Work travel is bitter sweet.

You know your a ftwm when...you feel like no decision can make everyone happy, including yourself.

Closing Time

I need some more work stories. Its very easy to blog about the mommy side of my life and I forget to blog about the working woman side.

I would like to ask the question...why do they close my office bathroom for cleaning when I'm getting ready to leave work at the end of the day? I leave at 4:30, which I think is a normal leaving time. I'm usually rushing to get out the door so I can get to daycare before it closes. Every working parent knows about trying to get to daycare before they close.  I have a long commute and I pick up Teagan. By time I leave work, I won't get to my house for another 45 minutes to an hour. That's a long time to hold it. I could go find another bathroom on a different floor. But that's too much effort when I'm in "I get to see baby soon" mode. So I just suck it up and pray there is no traffic jam for the day.

Do the cleaning employee's have comment cards?

You know you're a ftwm when... leaving work has a whole new motivation.

Baby Babbles

I have a sweet story to share.

Last Friday, both the Mr. and I dropped off Teagan at daycare together. As soon as we came in, her little friend N appeared. He pointed and babbled. Teagan ran to him and they started chatting it up. They both went frolicking into the playroom together. I wondered if they could understand each other or even had their own little language.  It warmed my heart seeing the two of them babbling and playing with the same toy together. It was obvious to see how excited they were to see each other.  I tried saying  bye to Tea but she was too busy with N. Mommy didn't matter. Apparently this is an everyday occurrence.

Bret does drop off because I'm a wuss. Maybe we should trade. I leave the house first in the morning and Teagan cries most of the time. Bret stated when he drops her off at daycare she so happy with N that she  never cries.

Friday morning was a good morning. It made me so happy to know Teagan loves daycare and she is building relationships with her little classmates.

You know you're a ftwm when...you need constant assurance you're making the right choices.


I didn't take many pictures this weekend. However, I always take pictures of Teagan sleeping at night when I check on her. Here's a goodie from last week:

Clean House

Yes, you with your beautifully decorated, clean house. You, I don't like you. Your lack of dust, finger print free windows, and carpet with vacuum carpet lines makes me uncomfortable.

I'm not sure how my house survived last Saturday. We only lock up a few of our key cupboards (under the sink and the china hutch). We thought its good for baby to explorer. We may have to rethink this. The day started off with Teagan breaking one of my bunny bowls. Later on she figured out how to open spice bottles.  We let her play with the spices. They're kind of like a rattle. It looked liked it snowed garlic powder in my kitchen. I couldn't get to Teagan fast enough. She was pretty much rolling in it. After I vacuum her off (which she though was hilarious though she still reeked of garlic), I began cleaning the floor. While doing so, Miss Tea found a glass of water and poured it onto our faux leather couch that cannot get wet. The hubby and I finally got our house back into order and sat down for lunch. Teagan then decided to take a bite out of my foam kitchen mat under the sink.

So yes, you with your free time or childless home. You,  with the miraculously clean house. You, I envy you.

You know you're a ftwm when...despite the fact you clean you kitchen floor every day, its still dirty.

Weekends

Baby girl LOVED the circus. She sat for one hour. Let me repeat that, ONE HOUR! If anyone knows Teagan they know she does not sit, ever. There was three of us moms and 3 one year olds. We were brave or crazily optimistic. But all the kids enjoyed it.

Our weekends are always busy. Sometimes we need a weekend from our weekends. I once used weekends to catch up on sleep, clean the house, run errands. But that never happens anymore. We're either traveling, or have something local going on (birthday parties, family functions, social events, etc). Ever since we've had Teagan, I feel like we've become more popular. I should probably say our popularity is the same and Teagan is the one everyone wants to see. Bret and I feel guilty declining so we just keep filling up our calendars. There was one point last summer, where we were not home for 6 weekends in a row. Our poor cats are becoming feral.

Is this just a normal part of parenthood?

I'm looking forward to winter when nothing is going on. Bring on the cold.

You know you're a ftwm when....you finally check something off your todo list, 5 new items are added back on.

A real tent circus!

Teagan paying attention

Baby girl and I.  The wet shirt is from a snow cone. I didn't realize  a snow cone could be so messy.

Tada!

How do you like my blog makeover? No more boring Blogspot template.

I was thinking of ending each of my posts with a "You know you're a full time working mom when..." section.  I thought about shortening full time working mom to ftwm, since I've seen sahm (stay at home mom) on other websites. Then I realized ftw mom backwards is mom wtf. Haha. Yes. Mom wtf as in why do I put myself though this lifestyle and spread myself so thin? I got a good chuckle out of this.

So in good spirit:

You know you're a mom wtf when: You're cube is littered with pictures of your children.

24 Hours

Its been a while since my last post. I was wondering if I would have enough time for this new blogging hobby. Working full time, being a mommy, and a wife leaves very little time left over. Tonight the husband is playing softball and baby is sleeping. Its ME time. I already worked out too. Go me! 

I know I do not give enough time to my husband and our extended families. And I'm awful at keeping up to date with my long distance friends. I think about them. Does that count?

My ideal day would be 

-Wake up before baby. Shower, get ready, eat breakfast, get my crap ready for the day.

-Wake up baby, play with her

- Drive to work, work, drive home

- Pick up baby from daycare, make/eat dinner

-Hang out with the family (lately we've been either playing "chase me" outside, or have a dance party with YouTube music videos in the family room)

-Put baby to bed (there's a whole schedule just here)

-Do dishes, clean, workout (I've been trying to work out every other day), and if I'm lucky watch TV in bed. But I usually fall asleep within a few minutes. 

Reality:

-Baby wakes up early (5:30am this week....eew. I already gave up hope she'll sleep in this weekend. Sometimes she'll sleep to 7/7:30, but not the past few days).

-Husband  and I try to entertain her while taking showers and getting ready

-Teagan clings to me as I try to make breakfast, pack lunches

-I'll have to change my clothes due to baby slobber, food, or milk stains. 

-I leave for work and Teagan cries. I become sad. Husband texts me that she's happy right after I leave, but my morning is shot.

-Somehow my sleep deprieved self drives to work, usually later than planned.

-Work

-Drive home, get baby from daycare

-Evenings somehow go to plan. They are the best part of my day. 

Weekends will be another post. 

I've learned I can write posts and have them publish in future dates. I hope to write many over the weekend and have them publish throughout the week, since I have little time to do anything on weekdays. 

We're going to the circus this weekend! I cannot wait to see Teagan's reaction. She LOVES animals. I just really hope she likes it and is entertained. I've never taken her to a show before and she is a child that has to move. She never sits still. 

Here are some pictures from last weekend.

The First Day

I wish I started my blog when I went back to work after maternity leave. I have so many stories. Maybe I'll throw one in once and while. I'll chat about the first day now.

I was looking forward to going back to work. Having a structured schedule, even without sleep was appealing. I think I was ready to go back because I knew during my leave I would go back. My husband thought we would drop Teagan off at daycare together. Um, no thank you. I knew it would be hard and I didn't want any part of that. I had him drop her off (and I still do! I'm too soft to drop her off). I left the house first. I had barely any sleep but the excitement of the day gave me energy. Just as I left my sub, I started bawling. The tears hit me out of now where. I didn't expect that.

I would like to say being away from Teagan got easier. But it doesn't really. Its still hard to leave her every morning but you do get used to leaving. My neighbor has recently returned to work from maternity leave and she said its awful. I feel her pain and wish I could give her advice. Working and being a mom is just hard. I have never come across a working momma that says she loves to be away. We're not these workaholic heartless women that is so often portrayed. We love our babies. We love to be with them. We also like our jobs or enjoy working. You need to find a balance between the two.

Whats even harder about finding your balance is having to defend your decision to work. Some comments I've been told have really hurt. You can't just be a working mom. You have to be a working mom with a reason for working. There are a few comments that I don't think I will ever forgot. One being: "I don't understand why you would let someone else raise your kid." [Side note: I worked full time and nursed Teagan for 12 months. Something I'm very proud of. I could have a whole blog on that topic. I'm sure I'll post about that later]. Another comment: "I would feel like a cow if I had to pump." Well you know what, my husband and I are doing a great job raising our kid and MOOOO. Ha. I just made myself laugh.

For other working mommas out there, just remind yourself you're doing what's best for your family and that's all that matters. Children unconditionally love their parents.

Here's my little lovebug when I returned to work. It's hard to remember her being so small.

One of Tea's first big smiles.

A rare moment when Teagan snuggled on me.